Tag Archives: Miss USA

Miss Universe Olivia Culpo Forgot To Wear A Bra To The Great Gatsby Screening In New York City (NSFW)

It’s not too difficult to see why Olivia Culpo was crowned Miss Universe. Gorgeous eyes, a great smile and perfect brown nipples. It’s not rocket science. And thanks to F. Scott Fitzgerald, we all got a chance to see Olivia Culpo’s nipples.

"The Great Gatsby" Special Screening - Outside Arrivals

Gotta love “flash” photography!

The Great Gatsby is probably my favorite book. It tells the impossible story of how the actions of one man, driven to win back the one who got away, ruins the lives of everyone around him. It is an American classic.

But then Bahz Luhrmann had to go and make it into a shitty movie.

Thankfully, here’s Olivia Culpo showing up to the New York City screening at the MoMA in a see-through dress. A bold fashion choice, if there ever was one.

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Tell me Olivia Culpo didn’t show up to the premiere hopping out of a yellow cab

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I’d read all the American classics if Olivia Culpo showed up to all their movie screenings

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Look at that smile!

If there ever were such a thing as a perfect pair of light brown nipples, I’d like to think that Miss Universe Olivia Culpo has them.

More pics of Olivia Culpo and her super brave fashion statement after the jump (NSFW).

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Meet Miss USA 2012 Olivia Culpo

This past Sunday, this proud country of ours crowned the next Miss USA to represent us on the world stage for the upcoming Miss Universe competition. During the Miss Universe competition our country will pit one stick thin girl against another in several tests looking for the tightest bikini, smallest brain, and shiniest teeth. Only one will come out alive. The rest will be banished forever, forced to live in my basement. Locked up. Twin bed. One pillow. No pillow case.

This is the sequel to The Hunger Games.

But before we get there, we had to choose just one out of 51 contestants. Contestants who were willing to do this for their country.

Out of 51 girls, just one remained.

Meet Miss USA 2012, Olivia Culpo of Rhode Island. She’s a tiny little hottie I just want to put in my pocket. Yes, that is where I keep all my hotties. In my pocket.

OMG, y’all!

“I’m so pretty. Oh so pretty.”

Say “Ahh”

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

Could’ve used more oil on them legs

Look at that camel toe!

Knockout

A face I’d nut on

More bikinis!

Moar!

Gahhhhhh

Hubba Hubba

Hit the jump for more of this hottie with a body.

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Former Miss USA Rima Fakih Arrested For DUI, Still Smokin’

Rima Fakih, who you may remember as the former Miss USA 2010, was arrested in Highland Park, MI for DUI. Uh-oh…

Former Miss USA Rima Fakih sporting the latest in camel toe

Billed as the first Arab-American Muslim winner, Rima Fakih is showing us just how American she really is — by getting arrested for driving drunk.

See, not all Muslims don’t know how to have fun.

Here’s some pics of her gorgeous self.

Miss USA can get down

Miss USA knows how to work the poles

Miss USA knows how to work the crowds

They sell bikinis in Michigan?

Hot damn! She can bake my falafels any time.

She's too pretty to go to jail

Miss USA 2011

Last night was the 60th annual Miss USA Pageant. Miss California won.

Let me just say that it was a blast watching not 1… not 2… but 51 stick-figure thin broads prance around my television screen, smiling their pearly white smiles and batting their perfectly long lashes, all in an attempt to get in my pants. I really felt a connection with some of them. Particularly Miss Hawaii (Angela Byrd). Hey boo, call me if you know what’s good for you.

Watching the live broadcast from Las Vegas, I couldn’t help but wonder out loud, what would become of these girls? Seriously.

From losing beauty pageants...

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