Tag Archives: legs

Ke$ha Showed Up To The 2013 Billboard Music Awards Looking Not So Terrible And Totally #@$%able

Posted on May 20, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Who knew that underneath all that glitter and meth sweat was a totally #@$%able and not so terrible looking broad? I’m talking about Ke$ha who showed up to last night’s 2013 Billboard Music Awards looking good. Considering that it is Ke$ha that we are talking about here.

And so, if you combine the fact that Ke$ha has shown that she has absolutely no problems licking some sweaty balls with the fact that she might have actually taken a shower (using soap and water!) and showed up last night wearing a dress that totally showed off her ass, then maybe, just maybe, you might agree with me that Ke$ha looked good enough to bone.

Damn, girl. You clean up nice

Gold tooth still in, but looks like maybe she brushed her teeth

Who knew that Ke$ha got a booty like that?

But only if you were like completely desperate and about eleven drinks in.

More pics of Ke$ha looking not so terrible after the jump.

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Posted in Hardbodies, Music

Tagged ass, bare ass, Billboard, Billboard Music Awards, Billboard Music Awards 2013, booty, butt, clean up nice, great ass, Hardbodies, Ke$ha, Kesha, leggy, legs, looking good, Music, nice ass, nice butt, nice outfit, not so terrible, pop, pop star, sidebooty

Zoe Saldana Don’t Need No Stinking Bra To Promote “Star Trek Into The Darkness” At Jimmy Kimmel Live

Posted on May 9, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Zoe Saldana was on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night and she looked fantastic considering that she was jet-legged. Or hungover. Or a combination of both. Normally, I’m not the biggest fan of girls who are lacking in the funbags department but there’s just something about Zoe Saldana that oozes sex. Maybe it’s the accent? Or maybe it’s the perfect skin complexion? Or those super long legs?

Or maybe it’s the fact that she didn’t wear a bra on her way to see Jimmy Kimmel. Whatever it is, I’d do some terrible, terrible things to Zoe Saldana.

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Zoe Saldana got that sexy ass walk… mmmm!

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Look! Someone threw her a bouquet of flowers!

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Must’ve been cold in Hollywood last night

Nothing like a pair of extra hard nips to get a bunch of Trekkies excited enough to drop $15 to spend two and a half hours in a dark room together. Beam me up!

More pics of the Zoe Saldana feeling extra nippy in Hollywood after the jump.

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Posted in Boob Tube, Hardbodies

Tagged babes, beautiful, beauty, boobies, boobs, celebrity, chicks, cutie, gorgeous, hard nips, Hardbodies, Hispanics, hot, hottie, J.J. Abrams, Jimmy Kimmel Live, killer accent, Latin American, Latina, leggy, legs, long legs, movies, natural beauty, nice nips, nice outfit, nippy, sexy, sexy accent, skinny, smokeshow, smokin', Star Trek, Star Trek Into The Darkness, thin, trailer, Zoe Saldana

Courtney Stodden Showed Up To A Fashion Show Looking Like She Was Made Of Plastic

Posted on May 9, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Get it? Because she’s got big fake tits.

For those of you who can’t get enough of Courtney Stodden, here she is at the Maggie Berry Fashion Show on Melrose in Hollywood. And she looks like she’s wearing a dress made up of plastic scraps stitched together by an amateur fashion designer dying to make it onto Project Runway. Or it might have been stolen from the set of the next X-Men movie. Who knows where she got it from?

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“I wonder what she can do with a beer can” #ThingsYouAreProbablyThinking

And quite honestly, do we really care? As long as you get a nice view of her cleavage and some leg, is anyone really complaining?

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I imagine this is how a lot of her photos came out – with her mouth wide open

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How do you think Courtney got her invite? In a white envelope left on the dresser?

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Her face actually doesn’t look all that bad…[gallery columns="5" link="file" ids="13114,13115,13116,13117,13118,13119,13120,13121,13122,13123"]

Also, great job by her makeup artist, Abigail, who somehow found a way to cake on enough makeup so that Courtney Stodden didn’t look like a hooker. That you already #@$%ed and kicked out of your room because she wanted extra for anal. She actually looks like a hooker before you took her to your room. That’s talent.

More pics of Courtney Stodden after the jump.

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Tagged age of consent, awesome tits, babes, boobies, boobs, chicks, cleavage, cleave, Courtney Stodden, creeper, creepy, Doug Hutchison, fake tits, great rack, great tits, Hardbodies, hot, hottie, leggy, legs, long legs, marriage, nice outfit, nice pair, nice rack, nice tits, parental consent, plastic, silicone, skeevy, skin-tight dress, tits, titties, trashy, underage, white trash

Courtney Stodden Went Shopping At A Kids Store And That’s Okay Because She’s Still Very Much A Kid At Heart

Posted on May 9, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | 1 Comment

Courtney Stodden became famous because she went and got married at the tender age of 16 to 51 year old Doug Hutchison. But now that she’s 18 years old, it’s sort of okay to look at her parading around her fake body parts.

Look! Here she is shopping in a kiddie store in delightfully short shorts.

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“Did you guys get my ass cheeks peeking out of the shorts?”

It’s kind of creepy if you think really hard about it, but be more like Courtney Stodden and try not to think too much. Besides, I’m pretty sure that most of her body parts are still considered under 11 years old.

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From the back, Courtney Stodden sure doesn’t look 18

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And definitely not looking 18 from the front either

They sure don’t make kids like they used, huh?

More pics of Courtney Stodden that’ll make you feel dirty after the jump.

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Tagged age of consent, awesome tits, babes, boobies, boobs, chicks, Courtney Stodden, creeper, creepy, Doug Hutchison, fake tits, great rack, Hardbodies, hot, hottie, leggy, legs, long legs, marriage, nice rack, parental consent, plastic, short shorts, silicone, skeevy, tits, titties, trashy, underage, white trash

Would You Wednesday

Posted on May 8, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

It’s about time Kim Kardashian moved on

Because her little sister, Kendall, is doing it way better

It’s finally happened. The torch has been passed. From one Kardashian cash cow to a Jenner, the future earnings of the Kardashian clan now rests on the tiny shoulders of one Kendall Jenner.

And even though she’s only 17 (legal in several states!), I think she can handle it.

Kendall Jenner — Would you… with no rubbers?

More pics of Kendall Jenner at a photoshoot on the beach after the jump.

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Tagged babes, bathing suits, bikini, butt, cash cow, chicks, cute butt, cute sister, great ass, hot, hottie, Kardashian clan, Kardashian Klan, Kendall Jenner, leggy, legs, long legs, models, nice ass, nice butt, photoshoot, sexy, sister, smokeshow, smokin', swimsuit, Would You Wednesday, Would You With No Rubbers?

Reese Witherspoon May Have Gotten Arrested Over The Weekend But Still Showed Up To Work The Following Monday

Posted on April 23, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Reese Witherspoon was arrested this weekend in Atlanta along with her husband and super agent, Jim Toth.

A combination photo shows Reese Witherspoon and her husband James Toth after their arrest in Atlanta

Rough weekend for Reese Witherspoon

Details surrounding her arrest paint a very drunk and very prissy Reese. Arresting officers describe Reese Witherspoon as being overly confrontational as they were booking her husband Jim Toth for a DUI. Overly confrontational? Little Miss Legally Blonde? “Pshaw, no way,” you say. Well, according to TMZ:

As officers dealt with Jim, Reese allegedly started acting up, telling cops, ”Do you know my name?”

The officer answered by saying, “No, I don’t need to know your name.”

Witherspoon then came back with, “You’re about to find out who I am … You are going to be on national news.”

Oh shit! The Blonde Queen of Rom-Com just broke you off with that pimp slap!

Of course, State Trooper J. Pyland did not take too kindly to Reese’s diva act and decided to arrest her on a disorderly conduct charge. Which is totally fine by her because she was able to get out the next morning on a $300 bond. And like a true professional, Reese still showed to work on Monday.

By now, the public apology has already been sent out to all the media outlets and her agent is hard at work on finding her new gig. Which makes total sense since her agent is also her husband, who was solely responsible for this entire fiasco.