Reese Witherspoon was arrested this weekend in Atlanta along with her husband and super agent, Jim Toth.
Rough weekend for Reese Witherspoon
Details surrounding her arrest paint a very drunk and very prissy Reese. Arresting officers describe Reese Witherspoon as being overly confrontational as they were booking her husband Jim Toth for a DUI. Overly confrontational? Little Miss Legally Blonde? “Pshaw, no way,” you say. Well, according to TMZ:
As officers dealt with Jim, Reese allegedly started acting up, telling cops, ”Do you know my name?”
The officer answered by saying, “No, I don’t need to know your name.”
Witherspoon then came back with, “You’re about to find out who I am … You are going to be on national news.”
Oh shit! The Blonde Queen of Rom-Com just broke you off with that pimp slap!
Of course, State Trooper J. Pyland did not take too kindly to Reese’s diva act and decided to arrest her on a disorderly conduct charge. Which is totally fine by her because she was able to get out the next morning on a $300 bond. And like a true professional, Reese still showed to work on Monday.
By now, the public apology has already been sent out to all the media outlets and her agent is hard at work on finding her new gig. Which makes total sense since her agent is also her husband, who was solely responsible for this entire fiasco.
Like true professionals, husband and wife are back at work after a rough weekend
“Don’t you worry guys. Jim did not drive tonight”
If I’m Jim Toth, I’m doing whatever it takes to sign Reese Witherspoon up for yet another sequel to Legally Blonde – Legally Blonde 5: Say My Name.
More pics of Reese Witherspoon putting on a brave face after the jump.
Posted in Don't Get Caught, Hardbodies
Tagged arrest, arrested, babes, celebrity, celebrity drama, celebrity news, chicks, cute, cutie, disorderly conduct, Don't Get Caught, DUI, Hardbodies, hot, hottie, Jim Toth, legal drama, legal matters, leggy, legs, Reese Witherspoon, sexy, smokeshow, smokin', TMZ
Yesterday, I introduced you #@$%ers to your neighbor, Sarah Jones. Remember? The former Cincinnati Ben-Gals? Cheerleader? C’mon! The high school English teacher who #@$%ed her 16 year-old student? Who she left the courtroom hand-in-hand with? Yeah, that broad.
Well, I for one am sick of the double standard that exists when it comes to these sorts of cases. Ya know, the ones where the hot young teacher ends up #@$%ing one of her students only to get off relatively free of any real punishment… Except for this chick, I think she only hooked up with her student (lame!).
So, let’s not forget that Sarah Jones had sex with a 16 year old.
That ass must’ve looked great in a pencil skirt
I bet her cheerleading routine was a big hit with the boys.. or girls (I’m not judging)
Wow, what a huge slut!
“Look mom, just like you taught me.”
The thing about Ms. Jones’ class is that she only gave out two grades — B’s and J’s.
I know what I want for Christmas, wrapped up in a cardboard box
More pics of another teacher involved in extracurriculars after the jump.
Posted in Don't Get Caught, Gossip-Mongering
Tagged Cincinnati Bengals, crazy #@$%er, crazy stupid news, Don't Get Caught, double standard, Kentucky, minors, NFL cheerleader, no pedo, Sarah Jones, sex with kids, sexual abuse, sexual misconduct, student-teacher relations, teacher, underage
Griselda Blanco was one bad-ass broad
This past Monday, notorious cocaine kingpin Griselda Blanco was assassinated on the streets of Medellin, Colombia. She was known for her brutal violence while running a drug empire that brought in an average of $8 million per month.
To say that she was the original H.B.I.C. (Head Bitch In Charge) would be an understatement.
Three and a half things you should probably know about “Cocaine Godmother”:
Mmmm… Cartel kingpins never looked this good
1. Griselda Blanco was a cold-blooded killer. You don’t build a distribution network that spanned the East Coast of the United States all the way to Colombia by making a ton of friends. Instead, you probably have to chop up a lot of bodies. And this is what Griselda Blanco was known for — an unprejudiced appetite for killing anyone in her way. Colombian authorities suspect that Blanco ordered an minimum of 250 hits. And if you thought King Henry VIII was bad, you never met Griselda Blanco who routinely killed her husbands, baby daddies, partners, and basically any one who gave her a stank eye.
2. Griselda Blanco started her criminal career young. Growing up poor in the slums is hard enough. Growing up poor in the slums and in an abusive household is even harder. So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that Griselda Blanco started her career as a hardened criminal at the age of 11 — by kidnapping and killing another child. After that baptism by fire, Griselda Blanco went into prostitution and pickpocketing before moving to New York in the ’70s. By then she had three children and a burgeoning cocaine enterprise. By the ’80s, Griselda Blanco established a distribution network that brought in millions. Pablo Escobar was still flying his own cocaine-filled planes by then.
Griselda Blanco probably had sex whenever she wanted
3. Tony Montana got nothing on the “Cocaine Godmother”. Griselda Blanco was appropriately nicknamed the “Cocaine Godmother” and was one of the earliest pioneers of cocaine trafficking in the United States. After murdering her first husband and business partner, Blanco showcased her criminal brilliance by successfully maneuvering around the legal system before being forced to run her empire from behind bars for 10 years. Luckily for her no extra time was tacked on since police secretaries assigned to her case were found to be engaging in phone sex with her top Buttonman. And while she was indeed a ruthless drug lord, she did seem to have a great sense of awareness — naming her youngest son after Godfather character Michael Corleone. And that sort of meta irony makes her death kind of poetic after she was assassinated by motorcycle hitmen — a tactic she has been credited with inventing. Ironic? Definitely.
3½. Cocaine is one helluva drug.
First come the bricks
Then come the eight balls
Then come the strippers
And then you get rid of the bodies
Posted in Don't Get Caught, Lesson Learned
Tagged assassination, blow, cartel, cocaine, Cocaine Godmother, Colombia, Colombian, crime, crime pays, criminal, Don't Do Drugs, Don't Get Caught, drug dealers, drug dealing, drug smuggling, drugs, empowering females, Griselda Blanco, killer, killing, Lesson Learned, Medellin, Medellin Cartel, murder, murderer, new age feminism, nose candy, snow candy, strong women, white girl, yayo
Last week, Fred Willard was arrested for lewd conduct. In a porno theater. Obviously, he was caught with his pants down. Masturbating.
“I swear to you, my hands are clean!”
He was masturbating in an adult movie theater. Wait, people still attend adult movie theaters?
Fortunately for Fred, the charges won’t “stick” due to a technicality in the law, which states that the lewd act must be within earshot of offended parties — which sounds a lot more disgusting that it should. So basically, Fred Willard got off.
And now YouPorn, that adult video streaming giant with a heart of gold, has offered to send Fred Willard a brand-new laptop in an effort to educate our senior citizens still inclined to clear the pipes and check the plumbing.
Because well, let’s face it, no one should be jerking off in a porno theater anymore.
Here’s an excerpt of the open letter YouPorn sent to Fred Willard:
“We are very impressed that at your age you still have such a strong, and healthy libido Fred! That’s why we wanted to educate you a little more on some of society’s newest advances to help you achieve orgasm from the privacy of your own home!
First there is our website, youporn.com which is found on a place called the “internet”. Some people say that former Vice President of the United States, Al Gore invented it, (but that’s a whole different discussion).”
Read more at http://www.inquisitr.com/282444/youporn-offers-adult-theater-fan-fred-willard-a-free-computer/#PmzCRXpB4itZb5tH.99
Posted in Don't Get Caught, Gossip-Mongering
Tagged adult movie, arrest, caught with your pants down, charges, Don't Get Caught, Fred Willard, free laptop, gossip, jerking off, lewd, masturbating, masturbation, porn, porn site, porno theater, pornography, Tiki Theater, YouPorn
When sex parties with pornstars go bad, they go really bad.
As in bludgeoned to death by a sledgehammer bad.
Amanda Logue aka Sunny Dae & boyfriend/accomplice Jason Andrews
In May of 2010, Dennis “Scooter” Abrahamsen thought he was going to #@$% blonde pornstar Sunny Dae at his New Port Richey, Florida home. After all, he did pay for her “services” for the sex party he was hosting. The next night after guests of “Scooter” Abrahamsen’s party left, Sunny Dae stayed behind.
Sunny Dae and her sometime on-screen, always off-screen lover, Jason Andrews, had planned “this take” for months according to text messages used by law enforcement to charge the murderous pair. They were going to kill and rob him before #@$%ing each other.
Andrews: “I’m so glad you’re really commited (sic) to this take. Keep eyes for a knife, etc (sic) for me!”
Dae: “I’m (expletive) exited (sic) … I want to (have sex) after we kill hum (sic).”
Andrews: “You just get him relaxed and face down … Take. Your. Time.”
Is it just me or does that sound a lot like the plot to a very, very bad porno?
While boyfriend Jason Andrews pled to first-degree murder and life without parole in January, the pornstar formerly known as Sunny Dae pled guilty to second-degree murder in exchange for a reduced sentence of 40 years. Looks like all those gangbang and muff-diving scenes are about to come in handy.
Speaking of handy, check out this very NSFW video of Sunny Dae performing. Bet you $69 that the officers did their due diligence researching her past work history before throwing the book at her.
Posted in Don't Get Caught, Headliners
Tagged Addison, Amanda Logue, crazy stupid news, Don't Get Caught, homicide, jail, Jason Andrews, killer, killing, murder, murder case, murderer, news, NSFW, porn industry, porn star, prison, Sex Party, Sunny Dae, Tampa Bay Times