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Miranda Kerr Don’t Need No Stinking Victoria’s Secret, Her Tits Are Looking Just Fine (NSFW)

Posted on May 17, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Miranda Kerr is off to some start after her contract with Victoria’s Secret was not renewed. Not that I was too worried. She’s doing just fine. Thank you very much.

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“Sliding into a bathing suit and looking sexy. It’s like riding a bike” – Miranda Kerr

Clearly, Miranda Kerr hasn’t forgotten how to fit into itty bitty swimsuits and look sexy for the camera. And she seems to be in good spirits, considering that she’s already had what looks like an unfortunate(?) wardrobe malfunction on set. In fact, based off of these photos alone, it took Miranda Kerr a lot longer to realize that her tits were out than the P.A. whose initial instinct was to immediately grab a large sheet to cover Miranda Kerr’s chest with.

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I’ll admit that the P.A. knew shit was about to go down

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So tiny, yet so perfect!

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Shake it off, Miranda. Shake it off

Seriously, how was covering Miranda Kerr’s bare tits your first reaction?

More pics of Miranda Kerr’s itty bitties after the jump (NSFW). Also in .gif form!

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Tagged adorable, babes, bathing suits, beach angle pose, beach body, beautiful, bikini, bombshell, boobies, boobs, breasts, chick, cute, cutie, fashion, gorgeous, great tits, Hardbodies, hot, hottie, knockout, MILF, Miranda Kerr, models, natural breasts, nice nips, nice tits, nip slip, nipple, NSFW, photoshoot, sexy, small tits, smokeshow, smokin', supermodel, tits, titties, topless, Victoria's Secret, Victoria's Secret Angels

Nicole Neal And India Reynolds Perfectly Illustrate Just How Difficult The Blonde Or Brunette Debate Can Be Sometimes (NSFW)

Posted on May 15, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Blonde or Brunette?

The Blonde or Brunette Debate rages on. In my pants

For some it’s an easy decision. For many others, it’s as difficult a decision as vanilla versus chocolate. And now, thanks to a Nuts photoshoot featuring equally buxom babes in India Reynolds (The Brunette) and Nicole Neal (The Blonde), the “blonde or brunette” debate just got a little bit harder. And so did my penis.

Blonde…

Or brunette?

Can’t I just pick both?

There’s gotta be something in the water across the pond, right? Or are plastic surgeons just cheaper and better at their jobs over in England?

More pics of Nicole Neal & India Reynolds to help you decide after the jump (NSFW).

source= Hot Celebs Home

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Rosie Jones Is Really Good At Not Wearing A Bra (NSFW)

Posted on April 26, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

“You weren’t with me shooting in the gym!” – Rosie Jones

Rosie Jones is very good at what she does.

She’s particularly good at being topless, as detailed in this previous post. So here she is doing what she does best. And if there were some sort of an award for being really good at showing off your mammaries, we might as well just hand it to her. But don’t let that stop you young up and coming British glamour models from chasing after Rosie Jones. Because one day Rosie Jones will have to retire due to back pains and then the tiara will be yours. All yours. So go on ahead and show off your chesticles as much as possible, because one day…

One day this could be you in the pages of Nuts.

What was the reasoning behind starting a war with the British again? I forgot

This is totally safe for work, right?

I don’t see anything wrong with this one either

Rosie Jones is so good at not wearing a bra that it should be crime. I’m starting a petition to extradite her to the U.S. for further investigating.

More pics of Rosie Jones after the jump (NSFW). You can totally see her nips.

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Pics Of Irina Shayk In A Beach Bunny Bikini Make Me Want To Hump Her Like A Horny Rabbit

Posted on April 24, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | 1 Comment

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Irina Shayk #GoodGod

Supermodel Irina Shayk came busting out onto the whole bikini supermodel scene like a rabbit out of a foxhole. And she hasn’t slowed up her pace one bit.

In fact, she’s been keeping herself busy by showing up to red carpets looking like the most beautiful person in the world while also staking her claim as the hottest WAG in the game right now (she’s dating soccer superstar Cristiano Ronaldo). And just to make sure that you guys aren’t falling asleep at the wheel, every now and then Irina Shayk will pose for pictures in tiny bikinis - reminding you why she was chosen to be on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue in 2011.

Her latest photoshoot for Beach Bunny Swimwear is superb.

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Irina Shayk knows how to model

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For someone from Russia, Irina Shayk sure looks comfortable on a beach

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Add another to the list of “Reasons to Hate on Cristiano Ronaldo”

Way more pics of Irina Shayk in very little clothing after the jump.

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Lacey Banghard Has An Amazing Last Name To Go With Those Amazing Tits Of Hers

Posted on April 16, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | Leave a comment

Lacey Banghard. Say it with me. Lace-ee Bang-hard. Now say it again. Fun, right?

A great name to go with her amazing pair

There’s a lot of meaning in a name and how Lacey Banghard got hers must obviously come with an interesting little backstory. Even if you had the worst imagination in the world you could probably come up with a pretty creative re-imagining of how Lacey Banghard got her name.

So thank God Lacey Banghard is a total babe. I can’t even begin to imagine what life must’ve been like as a young Lacey Banghard. I mean, could you imagine all the dirty jokes the boys probably whispered behind her back in the playgrounds (“Get it? Bang. Hard.”). Seriously, life in middle school must’ve been hard for young Lacey. But, you know what, I would’ve totally been there for her and given her a nice broad shoulder for her to cry on. Because that’s what you do.

You can cry on my shoulder anytime, Lacey

And now that I think about it, I’m 100% convinced that this FHM shoot featuring Lacey Banghard is just another anti-bullying campaign.

She’s eating a banana. It’s gotta be a metaphor

And let me tell you, it’s working.

More pics of the English hottie I’d like to Banghard after the jump.

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Miranda Kerr May Be Getting Fired From Victoria’s Secret Because Hot Brazilian Chicks Grow On Trees

Posted on April 12, 2013 by the chronic fornicator | 1 Comment

Victoria’s Secret may be run by the most heartless corporate suits known to man. Either that or they may be the dumbest people on earth. Either of those explanations will do in explaining their reasoning behind why they would ever think to can über-hottie Miranda Kerr. I mean, just look at these pictures!

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Mom jeans on Miranda Kerr instantly become MILF jeans

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Those are abs post-pregnancy

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Yellow heels in bed FTW!

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I just told her my best knock-knock joke

Yes, I have a soft spot for the baby faced Miranda Kerr but that doesn’t change the fact that Miranda Kerr is indeed a very good-looking woman being paid to look good in pictures while wearing as little clothes as possible. And she does her job well.

So, while news continues to trickle out that Miranda Kerr wasn’t fired and instead chose not to renew her contract, let’s just stare at her nipples and think of how wonderful life must be for her part-time employed baby daddy Orlando Bloom.