Today, I released Chad Ochocinco from my fantasy squad. We had a good run but it’s time for a change. Breaking up is never easy. Hope you bounce back and land on your feet, Ochocinco. Take care.
October 18, 2010
Dear Mr. Ochocinco,
How you doing, man?
I don’t normally write letters to my fantasy football players but I’m making an exception for you. This is hard for me to write, but here goes. I think it’s best if we went our separate ways… It’s not you, it’s me. I just need a change. Breaking up is never easy. Especially when we’ve been through so much together. Remember Week 10, 2006? 11 catches for 260 yards and 2 TDs? Or how about the week after? 6 catches for 190 yards and 3 TDs? Or Week 17, 2007? WEEK 17, 2007! You singlehandedly won me the league championship with your performance. I’ll never forget that season – 93 receptions for 1,440 yards and 8 touchdowns. What a truly magical time. But then of course, Carson got injured in 2008. We promised each other it’d never happen again. That we’d never look back. I stuck around and enjoyed some good times in 2009. I thought 2010 would be good to us…
Let’s be honest, 2010 has been a disaster.
Yeah, you started off hot in Week 1 against NE, but, man, has it been rough since. I don’t want to lose you but it’s just not working out anymore. I don’t know if it’s a case of the quarterback losing his swag, the new teammate stealing the spotlight, or just you getting too comfortable being a reality TV star. Whatever it is it’s tearing us apart. I just can’t depend on you like I used to. I had to bench you last week. Granted, you had a bye but I remember when you could score double digit points even on your bye weeks. You were that good.
Even though this is the end for us, we’ll still have our memories. No one can take away our memories together. What we had was special. More special than Manning to Harrison, Culpepper to Moss, and Montana to Rice. What we had was truly one of a kind.
I’m 3-3 after 6 weeks. That’s .500. I’ve never been .500 in anything. Much like yourself, Ochocinco. Let’s get back to being our above average awesome selves. You’ll bounce back, you always do. You’re Chad Ochocinco.
Kiss the baby on the way out.
Your biggest fan