Haven’t you been wondering how Mac got so fat? I mean he’s huge…
He’s #@$%ing fat. Like disgustingly fat. So, how did it come to this — a Fat Mac.
It took a priest and a box of donuts to get to the bottom of this mystery and save for the priest, I thought it was well-worth it. You see, The Gang has grown quite popular around the South Philadelphia area, bringing in an inordinate amount of success and money into Paddy’s Pub. This can only mean one thing according to a skinny, single-chinned Mac — The Gang has reached its tipping point. Cue theme music.
Mac, still skinny at this point, surmises that The Gang has reached their peak, their zenith, their tipping point. They’re enjoying a level of success that can only be sustained if every member of The Gang continues doing whatever it is that they’re doing. So whether it’s Dee telling bad jokes, Charlie cleaning out toilets, or Dennis taking care of his hair, The Gang agrees that they all need to continue doing what they’re doing and to start getting some rest. Frank doesn’t buy into it and so, despite his best efforts, there is no sabotaging The Gang’s success.
But leave it to The Gang and their super-enlarged egos to take control of a good situation and derail it faster than you could say self-sabotage. Yes, The Gang can’t help but let their massive character flaws get in the way of them actually doing work. So Dee proves she is not funny, Dennis overcompensates to become another pretty face, Charlie can’t do anything right, and Mac decides it’s time to bulk up.
Shenanigans ensue. Dennis’s face looks like it’s been out with sun-dried tomatoes, Dee comes up with an awful plan that involves avatars, and Charlie tries to run the bar. Oh and this would be right around when Mac starts packing mass. “When Peter did the statue of David, he wasn’t just hammering at pebbles. First, he ordered the Jews to bring him a massive slab of marble,” Mac tells the priest, who has lost more than just his patience at this point of the “confession”.
At this point we kind of get an idea of why Mac put on the pounds — so he could say he’s 200 pounds. Unfortunately for him, 50 of that will just be bad weight. Not a good look, bro. Especially after The Gang has moved on to their many other schemes. You’d think all the jabs and jokes at the expense of your pants no longer fitting were all you needed to catch a hint, right?






