Eastbound & Down Recap: Chapter 10

“Making the world your bitch.”

Kenny Powers is back on his jet ski and living life the Kenny Powers way. “Banging the hottest chick in town, buying the most expensive fashions, throwing heat, and getting laid.” Who, in their goddamn minds, wouldn’t want to trade places with this guy?

Kenny is riding a high that no one can knock him off of – probably due to the hallucinogens and most definitely because he’s got the love of his life singing him a love song. While the Mexican villagers can’t seem to get enough, Roger has and takes him to the Wall of Immortals, a trophy case that would make your small-town high school athletic department cringe. And although Roger’s efforts to knock down Kenny’s star fail, that doesn’t stop everyone else from trying. Mr. Moneybags Sebastian has welcomed Kenny and Vida into his parents’ old bedroom which has been transformed into an ultra-sleek recording studio with Pro-Tools, Auto-Tune, recording booths, and candles. Vida sings them her first single, which no doubt stings Kenny’s pee-hole.

Thank goodness for Stevie, the ever loyal sidekick. While Kenny tries to break up the creative sexenergy between Vida and Sebastian, Stevie’s waxing poetically on “The Hombre Negro” and his awesome-ness. Kenny knows awesome-ness, as evidenced by his grand entrance into the game.

Back in the studio, Kenny slowly loses his grip as he struggles to convince Vida that the words to her new single are not a good fit. He pisses Sebastian off and shits all over his samples – not literally, of course. Vida confronts Kenny which prompts him to lay down his own brilliant vocals.

“Fuckin’ remix! Uh-huh. Uh-huh… I like to buttfuck fine ladies. Will I choke hold a bitch, well maybe. Uh-huh. Uh-huh…”

This instant chart-topper starts Kenny’s downward spiral into the deepest depths of asshole shit. Roger threatens Kenny to straighten up and quit his jive turkeying or else he’s sitting pine forever. Kenny, understandably, reacts like a 12 year old. Then Kenny catches Vida getting it in at the studio with Sebastian. Kenny, understandably, reacts like a 19 year old. Then Kenny comes home to catch Stevie boning Maria. Kenny, not quite as understandably, reacts in the most despicable way possible – forcing Stevie to break up with his first ever girlfriend and get his ass back on the mission.

The mission to find Eduardo Sanchez (Don Johnson). Nash Bridges, himself!

Eastbound & Down is on every Sundays at 10:30 P.M. on HBO. Estás fucking fuera!