The Round Of 32 Cordially Invites You To A Lesbian Threesome

While the Round of 64 may have been an arousing display of fundamentals and a showcase of great talents, the rounds hereafter will only get more demanding. More taxing. More grueling. And definitely a lot more sloppy.

In the Round of 32, I will again select a random video featuring each hopeful porn starlet but in the following categories of porn:

• Interracial Gangbang
• Lesbian Threesome
• Creampie
• Ass-To-Mouth

After watching the randomly chosen video, I will then select a winner based solely on her performance in that scene. While the Round of 64 weighed heavily on the history of the pornstar, the Round of 32 will give each girl a fighting chance — as long she’s bringing it.

Let the Pornstar Madness continue:

Lesbian Threesome (as defined by Urban Dictionary):

After getting my fill of penis after kicking off the Round of 32 with a gangbang, I’ve searched for a much-deserved refrain from penis. I know I declared in the beginning that all videos include at least one penis into vagina and I’ll stick to that. So let’s open up the definition of threesome.

Threesome (as defined by Urban Dictionary):

Happy? At least one penis. But why not throw in that extra broad to keep things interesting? That’s how the Greeks liked to do it. And they practically invented sex. Or was it whores? Or anal sex? Anyways, the lesbian threesome (with penis) is often times the preliminary step before full-on raging #@$%-fest or orgy. Again, another Greek invention.

West Bracket – Round of 32

Isis Taylor vs Lisa Ann

“You’re only as good as your teammates” is coach-speak for “I can’t help you win if all the people around you suck”. In porn, that is not necessarily a bad thing.

Lisa Ann has some lesbian fun with Ahryan Astin “acting” as casting agent. Not too much of a stretch considering her history. I dig that little scene. Very meta. Since Lisa Ann is such a pro, I knew that I would not walk away disappointed. Things to look for in a 2 girls/1 guy performance: double blowjob (11:02), some carpet munching (10:15), girl on face with girl on cock (22:20-25:30 Lisa Ann on bottom) (19:01-22:18), and a nice nut for both girls’ faces (26:21).

Now I won’t lie and say I think Isis Taylor is hotter than Lisa Ann. Nothing personal, just purely physical. That’s why I went into it as objectively as possible. Although I was surprised to see T.I.’s wife make an appearance. The double blowjob (6:10), the girl on face and girl on cock (10:03-12:16), and the shared cumshot (29:36) are all there.

But where’s the carpet munching? Instead of sticking her snatch in front of her female partner’s face while that other broad is getting rammed, Isis Taylor chose to rub her own clit and watch (21:20) . That’s no fun! And it wasn’t just symptomatic of Isis as her co-star also suffered from the same “creative decision” (25:42).

The #@$%ing was actually a lot better in Isis Taylor’s video but you gotta have the lesbian lovin’ in a lesbian threesome! Lisa Ann knows what she’s doing to get outta the Round of 32.

Midwest Bracket- Round of 32

Monique Alexander vs Yurizan Beltran

Hotdamn, I’ve been waiting for this one. An old favorite against a new favorite.

Monique Alexander, as you may recall, made her bones happily lapping away at snatches. When she finally got some dick into her, her career really took off. So what better way to celebrate this seasoned vet’s career with a lesbian threesome (with penis!). Monique Alexander’s performance starts off with her entering the scene well after her co-star’s penis has gotten wet in her female co-star’s mouth (4:01). The double blowjob soon follows (6:07). Then comes the carpet-munching (12:30) followed by more pussy licking while #@$%ing (16:24). And then finally comes the money shot (23:55).

But wait, was that a #@$%ing condom (23:25)?!

Yurizan Beltran could #@$% a goat and I’d still let her move on. A rubber? Inexcusable — even if he had AIDS. Sorry Monique Alexander, I’m going with the new blood in Yurizan Beltran. She’s not afraid of AIDS.

East Bracket – Round of 32

Tori Black vs Misty Stone

So Tori Black continues to take porn by the balls and absolutely #@$% the shit out of it. In her lesbian threesome performance, she buries that pretty model face of hers deep into the snatch of her nameless female co-star (3:32) after sharing her male co-star’s cock (1:40). That lesbian portion of the performance had the smallest inkling of an upset as there was no cock in sight. Luckily the male co-star gets his cue to enter (8:35) and ram away (15:59) as Tori Black splits her time between licking his balls and eating her co-star’s pussy. When it’s Tori Black’s turn to be the meat in the sandwich she doesn’t disappoint, as she’s gotta have the best cock-sucking face I’ve ever watched (18:46).

Oiled up with nowhere to go except down on that dick (14:56), Misty Stone puts her best effort forth. I mean, that lesbian portion of the fun was off the charts — shit had scissoring (9:36)! I saw some great stuff.

I really enjoyed Misty Stone’s performance but I don’t know… I guess it just shows you that I really like white girls in my porno. I mean, Misty Stone is hot. And she’s a great #@$%. I’m just not ready to have my Barack Obama victory.

Unfortunately, Tori Black is just too pretty to deny the win. Tori Black just barely squeezes it by the extraordinary Misty Stone.

South Bracket – Round of 32

Sienna West vs Sophie Dee

Sienna West likes to #@$ in nice places. Every video I’ve seen she’s either #@$%ing in a mansion, in a pool, or in a bathroom with more gold than a Jewish jeweler. While the threesome was hot and nasty (things I’ve come to expect with Sienna West performances), Sienna West isn’t even the better looking chick in the threesome. That honor goes to her co-star, Ricki Raxxx. Forgive that black eye and you’re in for a real treat as Sienna West goes straight to working after finally stepping on screen (7:31).

While Sophie Dee came into the second round riding a lot of momentum, she unfortunately can’t keep it up (get it?) this go-around. Her tits, as well as her co-star’s tits, were way too unnatural looking. Especially when wrapped around some black dude’s cock (20:03). While Sienna West was wrapping her tits around her co-star’s cock in between thrusts into Ricki, Sophie Dee was fisting away (31:42).

And that pretty much sums up what separates winners from losers. Titty-#@$%s and Fistings. Sienna West moves on with a healthy assist from Ricki Raxxx.

Welp, that was nice.