This past Sunday, this proud country of ours crowned the next Miss USA to represent us on the world stage for the upcoming Miss Universe competition. During the Miss Universe competition our country will pit one stick thin girl against another in several tests looking for the tightest bikini, smallest brain, and shiniest teeth. Only one will come out alive. The rest will be banished forever, forced to live in my basement. Locked up. Twin bed. One pillow. No pillow case.
This is the sequel to The Hunger Games.
But before we get there, we had to choose just one out of 51 contestants. Contestants who were willing to do this for their country.
Out of 51 girls, just one remained.
Meet Miss USA 2012, Olivia Culpo of Rhode Island. She’s a tiny little hottie I just want to put in my pocket. Yes, that is where I keep all my hotties. In my pocket.
OMG, y’all!
“I’m so pretty. Oh so pretty.”
Say “Ahh”
U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!
Could’ve used more oil on them legs
Look at that camel toe!
Knockout
A face I’d nut on
More bikinis!
Moar!
Gahhhhhh
Hubba Hubba
Hit the jump for more of this hottie with a body.
the chronic fornicator
pudge NASTY
